"It's not like Bernie can come out Gay. He'd just be creepy. Like child-molester creepy."

"Huma, they're bringing it all up again. The women. Bill's fucking women. I'm losing the 'Woman Card'..."

"Hillary, women understand that you did what you had to do."

"Old senile women, maybe. These younger girls have no idea what a woman had to do to get power."

"So we'll concentrate on the 'Old Ladies' vote. Maybe we'll get you a cat..."

"But I'm already losing the blacks and Jews --"

"Hillary, I have told you before: you know I am of Muslim heritage. The Blacks and Jews are the very most ungrateful and lowest of people."

"Yes, you have told me that before, Huma. But if I lose the women's vote it'll be over for me. No one will put money into my Foundation if I don't have the political power to give them things."

"Let's not get desperate, Hillary..."

"Huma: Marry me."

"What?"

"Let's divorce our husbands and get married. It'll show we have thrown off our shackles and reclaimed our Feminism. And it'll cement the Gay Voters. And the people that watch Lena's show."

"Hillary, you know my Heritage. My Family would turn their backs on me. Or worse."

"Oh, please. Can't the Muslims fucking get over themselves? They're already making things hard enough to be a Progressive."

"Hillary --"

"Can't you see, Huma? Young people LOVE the Gays. And then I can play the 'Anti-Gay' Card -- that would shore up my Voters."

"Hillary --"

"It's not like Bernie can come out Gay. He'd just be creepy. Like child-molester creepy."

"Hillary --"

"Huma, have we ever looked into Bernie's past to see if there is anything that could be construed as child molestation? Maybe he showered with young boys at a Socialist Camp-Out or something..."

"Hillary --"

"Yes, Huma, what IS it?"

"Hillary, I'll marry you..."

"Great news, Huma! You'll be First Lady!"

"I'd make a POWERFUL First Lady..."

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Huma. You'd be my Wife, but you'll still be my Bitch."

"Understood, Hillary: understood."

"And Huma...?"

"Yes, Hillary. You are shitting yourself...."

"But at least I'm shitting myself because of Happiness..."

I am Laslo.

http://althouse.blogspot.com/2016/01/nyt-90s-scandals-threaten-to-erode.html