Tuesday, March 21, 2017

I hope this helps put Richard Simmons' seclusion in better context.

There is a syndrome where fat women past their prime fixate on a gay male that they can perceive as not gay but asexual...

I call this 'Elizabeth Taylor Syndrome.' 

Sure, she was Elizabeth Taylor, but she got fat, and when she got fat what did she do? She spent her time hanging out with Michael Jackson. 

Michael Jackson: a gay male that Taylor could perceive as not gay but asexual. There is also the whole sex-with-children thing, too, but Liz probably thought Michael only molested asexual children like Macaulay Culkin in an asexual way...

So Liz got Michael. But not everybody is a Celebrity. And the typical Non-Famous Asexual Gay Guy in Eighties Middle America had a creepiness that somehow made Asexuality vaguely sexually threatening. Because unironic polyester, to begin...

Then, it Happened. Non-Famous Fat Women of America past their prime: they got Richard Simmons. Through the miracle of TV they ALL got Richard Simmons. He was THEIR asexual gay dude. Weird, but not in a threatening way. Accepting. His biggest accomplishment? For these women he made their giving up on sex easier to live with...

Because we know Richard Simmons didn't have sex. No. The Idea of Richard Simmons having sex is self-negating. If Richard Simmons had had sex he wouldn't be Richard Simmons: Ipso Facto...

Richard Simmons shattered the glass ceiling that prevented Non-Celebrity Fat Women from having their own Magical Asexual Gay Guy. It was okay to give up on sex. Heck -- like many of these women -- maybe Richard was raped a little, too, when HE was young...

But Times inevitably change. Reality TV -- of which Simmons IS a forerunner -- began to teach Fat Women With Elizabeth Taylor Syndrome that they can expect a better class of TV Asexual Gay Guy Friend: more handsome, less obviously desperate. Some of them could now look like the men they would want to have sex with, if they hadn't given up on sex...

TV Asexual Gay Guy Friend allows these women to even pretend that they maybe WOULD have sex, if only there were heterosexual men around as understanding and accepting as TV Asexual Gay Guy Friend. But -- of course -- there are no men to fill this description: because the description only works for Gay Guys. Whew: these women dodged a bullet, there...

And now the gay guys who look and act like Richard Simmons don't even get the friendship of Fat Women With Elizabeth Taylor Syndrome: Gay Progress has cast them aside, to forever be bridesmaids even though they can now legally marry...

I hope this helps put Richard Simmons' seclusion in better context.



I am Laslo.



https://althouse.blogspot.com/2017/03/but-as-unsatisfying-as-show-was-as.html

No comments:

Post a Comment