Laslo School of Shrew Taming.

Perhaps January Jones should Submit to the Laslo School of Shrew Taming.

She will learn not to judge her thinness by pounds but by understanding that a woman's perfect weight is that which best proportions her naked breasts. I will judge accordingly, without deviation.

She will come to understand that I do not care what she wears: knock yourself out. I will tell you when to be naked. In high heels.

She will come to appreciate that her every word is not to be taken seriously. Sometimes the importance of my blow-job overrides Your Great Insight. I may choose to listen later, between ejaculation and sleep.

She will be thankful for the realization that most of her female friends are idiots. This is not because they are jealous, usually, but because they are idiots. But sometimes they ARE jealous, too: this relates to the importance of the weight/breast-proportion lessons. 

She will come to understand that sometimes she is cute when she is angry. Getting angry about this only makes you cuter. Little Kitty Kat, are you Angry? Does Little Kitty Kat need a big bowl of milk? Note: 'Big Bowl of Milk' is generally a reference to blow-jobs. Of course. Naked, high heels. Of course, again.

She will learn the pleasure of self-satisfaction in making my coffee just the way I like it, and the consistency that comes with no deviations accepted. MY coffee is not YOUR creativity.

YOUR creativity is best expressed in blow-job technique. You can also play with lipstick colors. These may at times be connected.

I will support you fully in your submission to my will. You can tell your friends this is Zen.

I am Laslo.

http://althouse.blogspot.com/2015/01/uncreative-journalists-have-asked.html