"You and the Huma: do you have the butt-sex, like, togethers?"
"Neither Huma nor I engage in such sex, Alicia."
"Because Huma she is the Arab. Arab wimmen, they love the butt-sex."
"Alicia, just because a woman is Arabic does not mean she enjoys that particular action."
"Oh no, Mizz Hillary, you is the wrong. All women who are born of the swarthy men love the butt-sex."
"Arabs, Mexicans, South Americans, the Italians and the Greeks:all the women do the butt-sex."
"Because the men are swarthy."
"Yes! Now's you gets it, Mizz Hillary!"
"Alicia, neither Huma nor I have a penis."
"Oh, but they make the rubber dingdong for the lady-on-lady, yes? Strap on the dingdong, right? Push Push?"
"Alicia, neither Huma nor I 'strap on the dingdong'."
"You use a the banana? In my country a lot of women use a the banana. Or a gourd. Wide if you like."
"Alicia, perhaps we should focus on your next interview..."
"Yes, yes. Next interview: no mention the butt-sex."
"That's right, Alicia."
Laslo would know where to go from here.
I am The Replacement Laslo.