Thursday, September 22, 2016

"What do I do about the dismembered black man under my car?"

"Good afternoon, officer."

"License and registration, please. Do you know why I pulled you over?"

"I didn't signal when I changed lanes?"

"No, that's not it. Do you know you have a black man stuck under your car?

"Really? I just thought I needed new shock absorbers."

"It is definitely a black man under your car."

"Oh my. I don't know how that could have happened."

"Did you by any chance drive through the protest back on the interstate?"

"Sure. It was a mess. Glad I got out of there."

"Well, I think you ran over a protester. He's stuck under your chassis. Black man."

"Does he need help getting out from there?"

"I don't think that is an issue anymore. His legs came off about a mile back in front of the Burger King."

"This isn't good."

"Yeah. You've been driving with him face-down on the asphalt. He's like half a pencil with a worn-out eraser."

"What is going to happen to me?"

"This is a serious matter. You do realize I can't let you off with just a warning."

"I understand."

"So I'm writing you a ticket for changing lanes without using your signal."

"Oh boy. That's gonna jack up my car insurance."

"The law is the law."

"Yes, sir. Sir?"


"What do I do about the dismembered black man under my car?"

"High-pressure hose would be my best guess."

"Thank you, officer."

Laslo would know where to go from here.

I am The Replacement Laslo.

1 comment:

  1. OK, credit where it's due: This one made me laugh, but didn't make me guffaw. The real Laslo woulda made me guffaw. What have you done with him?