Friday, September 30, 2016

"A lot of men must want to have the butt-sex with you. Like a wheelbarrow."


"Mizz Hillary, maybe I no understand?"

"It's very simple, Alicia. You just need to tell people you were born with a penis."

"But I has no peenis, Mizz Hillary."

"Not anymore, Alicia: you do not have a penis anymore."

"But why, Mizz Hillary?"

"Because it makes Donald look like a fool to the Deplorables, discovering he had a transsexual win one of his beauty contests. And then there will be all the support from the LGBT crowd: you'll be an icon."

"Because I be born with dick?"

"Exactly, Alicia."

"Mizz Hillary, where be did my dick go?"

"Doctors took it from you when you were little. Religious conservative patriarchal doctors."

"They bad doctors to do that."

"Yes: yes they were: very bad. But look how far you've come since then, Alicia. You are a role model for us all."

"Mizz Hillary, I mees my peenis."

"That's right, Alicia: FEEL the story."

"I have no peenis and no real vageenay, I only can has the butt-sex."

"Maybe not that far, Alicia..."

"The LGBLT like the butt-sex, right Mizz Hillary?"

"Yes, Alicia: a lot of them do..."

"Drug Lords, they all make the butt-sex with me."

"Alicia.."

"Every Drug Lord, they tells me I am the Beautiful, then they bend me over the table and -- Whammo -- the butt-sex."

"Let's not mention Butt-Sex OR Drug Lords, Alicia; let's keep it simple."

"Seemple: I got it. I no mentions Drug Lords, Mizz Hillary. I no mentions the Butt-sex."

"Good, good..."

"Mizz Hillary?"

"Yes, Alicia?"

"Do YOU have the butt-sex?

"Alicia..."

"Cause you have the big big butt. A lot of men must want to have the butt-sex with you. Like a wheelbarrow."

"No, Alicia; I don't do the butt-sex."

"Ah. So THAT ees why Mr. Bill sees all those other women..."

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