"Was that still consensual?"
"It was consensual up until you pooped on me."
"But up until then we were good?"
"Yes, but I would never agree to THAT."
"I'm sorry, I was just in the moment, and it seemed like the next thing to do."
"Well, good for you, I guess, but in the meantime I'm sitting here naked and now have poop on me."
"This IS kind of awkward. I really didn't think this through, you know..."
"Can you, I don't know, get me a towel?"
"How about paper towels? They are meant to be disposable."
"You pooped on me and now you are concerned about the care of your towels?"
"Like I said, I didn't really think this thing through."
"What the Hell made you think I'd like that? Is this one of those 'rich guy' things? Like you can treat people however you please and expect to get away with it?"
"Look: I'm sorry. I am sorry that I pooped on you. Knowing what I know now, I would not have pooped on you; If I could take it back, I would."
"I don't think I ever have felt as bad as I do right now."
"Come on, I understand you're upset, but let's not get melodramatic."
"There are people dying every day of hideous diseases. Everywhere. This was just... some poop."
"This isn't just 'poop' -- this is SHIT."
"Uh, saying it that way, it makes it sound ...dirty."
"What the hell else do you think it is then?"
"An unfortunate sexual miscommunication, maybe?"
"I think I am going to throw up..."
"Let me get a wastebasket..."
"You shit on me and now you're concerned about vomit?"
"I don't want to make the maid's day any worse than it will be already..."
I am Laslo.