In fact, you could consider it an INVITATION!

Subject: Not Crazy This Time I Promise.

Importance: High.

Baby, it's me.

Please don't delete this before reading it, and please don't delete the attachments. But don't look at the attachments yet. Please.

Anyway, I have tried to be good when you said it was over, but I have all these memories inside me. And they are OUR memories, really: you were there for all of them, right beside me. Or on top and then behind me, if you remember that night after your brother's party ;) 

I should have let you do anal: I know that now. It is never too late, in fact if you were here with me right now I'd let you do anal, with me bent over the table: isn't that what you wanted? It could still be...

I know I got a little crazy there at the end: I know that. It's just that I could feel you slipping away, and I just KNEW you were using Internet Porn but now I understand why: I can be like those girls, too -- really I can!!

Remember that time when we were at the hotel at the coast and I wouldn't swallow so you came all over my face and I got so mad? I'm so sorry. I was listening to a lot of advice from my girlfriends and now I know they were wrong, they were just jealous of what we had...

And I know I put on a bit of weight at the end: I know that. It was just because I was depressed, but now I now I shouldn't have been depressed, I should've been happy with what we had. Anyway, I've been going to the gym and dieting: you can look at the attached pictures now.

See?

I'm thin again! And the selfie of me with the cucumber in my ass shows that I am ready for you now and open to anything -- in fact, you could consider it an INVITATION!

Anyway, I know it might be awkward to get together now, especially after the car thing (and I saw your car in your parking lot recently -- it looks like they fixed the paint real good!) -- maybe we could just have lunch sometime, no pressure, just us, together, and we can talk: I have SO MUCH I want to tell you...

Please call me. Or text, whichever. I can't wait to hear from you...

I am Laslo.

http://althouse.blogspot.com/2015/06/artist-molly-soda-describes-her-most.html