When I make eye contact with a woman during sex I lose my erection.

Socially Awkward Guy Who Makes No Eye Contact says:

I'm not really too concerned about various sexual positions. It's all good, as long as I am behind her and she can't see my face. When I make eye contact with a woman during sex I lose my erection.

And please: No Talking. When women talk during sex I lose my erection.

I also lose my erection if her cell-phone rings. Or my phone rings. Loud commercials on television can also make me lose my erection, especially if the commercials are for items for bodily functions. Especially feminine bodily functions. 

Also: dog barking.

I have always wanted to slap a woman's ass as I had sex with her -- from behind, of course -- but never have had the nerve to do it. I would probably lose my erection there, too.

Women laugh at me, I know it.

Peeing on them just seems so much easier.

Like no one else thinks these things.

I hope the Girl with the Blue Hair is working at McDonalds today.


I am Laslo.


https://althouse.blogspot.com/2016/09/i-just-didnt-have-another-sex-position.html