"Farook, have you noticed anything wrong with your internet?"
"I am trying to upload a cute ISIS Cat photo to our "I Can Haz Jihad" site but it is taking forever."
"That IS a cute cat photo: I especially like the suicide-bomb vest."
"The girls in America, they love this stuff."
"But the internet -- is slow, right?"
"It is slow."
"Do you think it is the Americans?"
"No, Amir, I don't believe so. They could never possibly find our site "I Can Haz Jihad".
"But what if one of the American ISIS girls alerted the authorities?"
"I read their Instagrams: they all just comment on how cute they look in their bikinis."
"We don't allow bikinis in ISIS now, do we?"
"No, but the American Girls do not know that."
"Ha Ha! Big surprise for them!"
"Indeed, Amir, indeed."
"But don't you think the Americans might be monitoring "I Can Haz Jihad"? Is it not possible?"
"They do not monitor "I Can Haz Jihad", nor do they monitor "Jihad We Mean It" or "Dreamy Teen Jihadi" or "Die Infidels Die."
"What about "ISIS Porno XXX"?
"That one they may have found..."
"That is a shame. I find the videos of women masturbating beneath their burkas hot."
"Indeed, Amir, indeed."
"Have the Americans cracked the code of "JTJT" yet?"
"Ha! No -- not HRHR, either."
"We stay one step ahead of them, don't we, Farook?"
"Yes we do, Amir. And we still have the site "Jihadi Grindr" to set up..."
I am Laslo.
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