Diary of a Conservative Trump Hater (excerpt)...
I did it again. I did not want to do it: I DID NOT WANT TO DO IT. But I did it.
I MASTURBATED TO GAY PORN AGAIN.
I know it is wrong, it is a SICKNESS. Sick. I HAVE A SICKNESS.
And after I masturbated I felt all those awful feelings again: SHAME. ANGER. SELF-LOATHING.
So I did what I always do after masturbating to Gay Porn: I went on the Internet and took out my SELF-LOATHING on TRUMP.
HE is the REAL SICKNESS.
I DESPISE the man, like I DESPISE THE SICKNESS IN MY SOUL: THE SICKNESS OF BEING COMPELLED TO WATCH GAY PORN AND MASTURBATE.
I try to STOP: Oh how I have TRIED. When the URGE strikes me I try to read the latest NATIONAL REVIEW, but that is no longer enough to quell the URGE.
After commenting on the Internet about how much I HATE TRUMP I feel better about myself, but the moment is FLEETING. It won't be long until the URGE returns, the URGE to watch a man fuck another man in the ass while I vigorously MASTURBATE.
Oh God, how I miss George Herbert Walker Bush! GEORGE HERBERT WALKER BUSH WOULD NOT WANT ME TO MASTURBATE TO GAY PORN. I KNOW THIS.
I am Laslo.