So I went to a Trump Rally, just to be able to say it was something I did: you know, wink-wink Ha Ha.
I won't bore you with Trump jokes, mostly because all the good ones have been taken already. But his hair. Anyway.
I spent most of my time just wearing my early-eighties Aerosmith shirt -- from that period where no one liked them anymore before everyone did again -- and looking at the crowd.
The crowd, let's face it, was what you would expect: old and white. I'd make a Old Folks Bingo Game reference, but that would be Old School.
One old white guy caught my eye in particular: he was wearing a red-white-and-blue shirt with a trucker cap hat that said "Make America Great Again."
First of all: trucker caps are only supposed to be worn ironically, preferably with the name of a cool small tavern in some town you never went to because you bought the cap at a Vintage store.
And I think America is already great. You know,local Breweries and iPhones. But I like the Chinese, too, because they are the ones that actually put those damned iPhones together. I would hate that job, but they must be OK with it.
So I am looking at this old white guy, and I realize he is old enough and white enough to be my Grandfather. If my Grandfather hadn't died in Vietnam. Where we were making America Great Again. I guess. Too bad he couldn't have died in World War Two, because that at least was a cool war.
Speaking of World War Two: did I tell you at the Trump Rally I was surrounded by a sea of white people looking adoringly at their leader? I don't want to make a Nazi reference, but I think I just did.
So after the rally I got a ride with Uber and met up with some friends at a local indie brewery. What do you know, one of my friends had a new trucker cap with the name of a cool small tavern in some town he never went to. This town was in Vermont, and Vermont is cool.
Anyway, they couldn't believe I went to the Trump Rally, except I did and they did believe it, they just 'didn't believe it' in that way of letting me know I had edgy indie cred.
They asked what it was like, so I pretty much told them the above. Without the snark on trucker caps, of course: I wouldn't want to hurt my friend's feelings.
I am Laslo.
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