So, I am just walking through the neighborhoods at night, nothing special, just wearing a Clown Suit and standing under streetlamps, when a car full of drunk teenagers pulls up.
"What the Fuck are you?" One of them yells as they get out of the car.
"I am The Spirit of Senselessness," I say, because that is the Name I have given Myself for when I stand beneath streetlamps at night wearing my Clown Suit.
"You're a Freak, that's what you are," says another; there is now the Unmistakable Ozone of Menace in the Air.
"If I am a Freak it is because the World is Full of Spiders," I say, trying to reason with them.
"What about fucking spiders?"
"They're everywhere. They're on everyone. Spiders. Tiny. They crawl into your ears and inside your brain. It is Inevitable."
"You're a Sick Fuck, you know that? People like you should have the crap kicked out of you."
"I would rather have a beer and drive around in your car."
"What?"
"I would like a beer, to begin."
"Johnny," one says, laughing, "get Clown Bro here a beer," and he does, from the cooler in the back seat.
I drink the beer in three gulps, then throw the bottle down the street; it shatters in the distance, a beautiful sound.
"I like the Sound of Things Breaking," I say, gesturing for another beer.
"Dude, we need to keep it kinda quiet, you know? There may be cops around."
"I am Invisible to Police. Also: A woman could fit into your trunk."
"What?"
"Let's go for a Drive," I say, but one of them shakes his head.
"I'm not sure I want to drive around with a Clown that is looking for women to put in the trunk of the car."
"Then you don't know anything about The Trunk of Destiny."
"Johnny, maybe we should be taking off..."
"I am the King of Clown Fuck!" I explain, but they back up to their car and climb in.
"Don't Fuck with the King of Clown Fuck!" I say as they leave, careening down the street before running up a sidewalk and into a tree.
I wonder if any of them are Dead.
I wonder if there is a Heaven, or if Senselessness is all there is to Life.
Plus I have to pee.
I am Laslo..
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