"Mother, I am with ISIS now!"
"Fatima, I have already told you: I do NOT want you hanging out with those boys: those boys are trouble."
"They're good boys, Mother, they just --"
"--They cut people's heads off, Fatima. Those are NOT good boys."
"Muhammed told me you wouldn't understand..."
"Your friend Muhammed tried to set your Father on fire, Fatima."
"Daddy is an Infidel, Mother!"
"He's still your Father, Fatima, and I will not have you hanging out with people who try to set him on fire."
"Mother, Muhammed wants me to be his fourth wife and help him in his fight for Allah!"
"So you're getting married, now? When were you going to tell your parents this bit of news?"
"I knew you wouldn't understand!"
And his Fourth wife? He's this young and he's been divorced three times already?"
"No, Mother. They are all still married to him."
"I didn't raise my daughter to live in a harem, Fatima. And how is this 'husband' going to support four wives might I ask? I don't see him with any job."
"We'll live on welfare from the Infidels until it is time to join the Fight in Syria. ISIS takes care of its own."
"So you're going to live in some mud hut in Syria while your husband is out and about cutting off people's heads? You wouldn't make it a week, Fatima: they don't have indoor plumbing."
"Mother, I have prepared. I have already stopped using toilet paper."
"Oh, Fatima..."
"Mother, I'm leaving."
"You are not going out of this House dressed like that!"
"It's a burka, Mother! It is the proper way for a woman to dress."
"It's a tent, Fatima. Why don't you go put on your yoga pants and that Miley Cyrus concert T-shirt?
"Those are of the Devil, Mother!"
"I won't argue with you about Miley Cyrus on that one, Fatima, but I wish you would stop and think about what you are doing."
"I am giving my Life to a Greater Cause! Our brothers will come and kill those like you, infidels. They'll cut heads with knives. And you know, my heart won't miss a beat."
"Fatima, does that include your beloved Grandmother?
"Grandma?"
"Yes: the infidel Grandma. Are you going to cut off HER head, the woman who looked after you and read you stories and baked you cookies?"
"I--"
"The Grandma who has done nothing but love you since the day you were born?"
"I -- I don't think I could do it, Mother."
"Now, THAT'S my Girl!"
"I think I would have to let Muhhamed do it..."
"I am Laslo.
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