I rubbed my naked testicles against the lip of the hot accounting chick's coffee cup, but it was not the same.

I fucked that office chair every way a man could fuck an office chair: missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, doggy-style, frog-style -- everything. I spoke French into its tight mesh and whispered sweet nothings to its rollers.

I fucked that chair so hard it should've had triplets.

Then, one day: new office furniture. I had to look away as that chair was wheeled out of the office into the furniture van.

Time passed; memories fade. I rubbed my naked testicles against the lip of the hot accounting chick's coffee cup, but it was not the same.

But then I noticed the hot accounting chick on her new chair. A new and special chair that just begged for it.

All was good again.

But -- please take note -- I was not the guy who ejaculated in her purse on that darkened Thursday: that is for amateurs.

I am Laslo.

http://althouse.blogspot.com/2015/07/at-new-cafe.html