Saturday, January 14, 2017

“Half-hour, this time. I won’t even be taking off my shoes.”

Authentic Big City Dialog...

“How are you doing tonight, Gwen?”

“I’m doing well, Isaac. How’s my favorite Uber driver?”

“Doin’ great. Mo money Mo money — we know ALL about that, right?”

“Oh yeah. The guy in my last session tipped me two hundred dollars.”

“Sweet. Did he pay extra for using the back door?”

“Not even. Straight doggy-style. Meat and potatoes, baby.”

“You know, sometimes with me driving you around to all your ‘appointments’, I kinda feel like your pimp. Ha.”

“You’d beat someone down for me, Isaac? If someone needed beating down, I mean?”

“Oh yeah. Where I grew up, beatin’ someone down ain’t no big thing.”

“Good to know, Isaac.”

“You have someone that needs beaten’ down, pretty lady?”

“There’s always someone, Isaac: there’s always someone.”

“Ain’t THAT the truth.”

“Funny. You know, what WOULD you charge if you were to beat someone down? You know, just talking, of course.”

“Of course. I bet we would find a suitable exchange.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Hell, we might even work it out in Trade. Just talking’, of course.”

“Of course.”

“How big is he?”

“How big is who?”

“This guy who needs beatin’ down: is he a big dude?”

“Pretty big. Used to work as a bouncer at I strip club I was at.”

“So a big dude.”

“What would that be? Like, an hour of Trade, maybe?”

“We’re just talking’, of course.”

“Oh yeah. Just talking.”

“A big dude, right? An hour sounds good. But it’d be a back door hour.”

“Back door? You’re gonna put the big hurt on him?”

“Hell yeah. He’ll be crying like a bitch, and he won’t even know why.”

“You like the back door, don’t you, Isaac?”

“Baby, I’m a Back Door Man.”

“Ah. The men don’t know…”

“…But the little girls understand. You got it, Gwen, you got it.”

“Well, this is good to know, Isaac. Just talking, of course.”

“Of course, Pretty Lady. And we’re here…”

“Thanks for the ride, Isaac.”

“See you in an hour?”

“Half-hour, this time. I won’t even be taking off my shoes.”

“Ha! Be safe, little girl…”

“I will, Isaac: I always am…”

I am Laslo.

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