Monday, December 26, 2016

“I kinda like that one, Bob, but we probably need to be more inclusive.”

At the Advertising Agency…

“People, Saudi Arabia has hired us to come up with a new Official Slogan for their country. Let’s start with some brainstorming, okay…”

“This one’s easy.”

Go ahead, James.”

“Saudi Arabia: Die, Jews, Die.”

“I LIKE the rhythm, James, but I’m thinking we need to go more positive, people.”

“Okay: then how about “Saudi Arabia: Jew-Free, Always”?”

“Ralph, that IS a step in the right direction, but let’s think wider, people.”

“Just brainstorming with this, but how about “Saudi Arabia: No Woman Drivers Here”?”

“I kinda like that one, Bob, but we probably need to be more inclusive.”


“Yeah. But in a way that doesn’t include gays, modern women or other religions.”

I got one — and it already has a song to go with it!”

“I’m feeling excited now, Frank: tell me.”

“Saudi Arabia: Whip It Good”.”

“Uh…it might be hard to get the song rights on this one, Frank, but I like your holistic approach.”

“Man, this is fucked up, Trevor. I mean, Saudi Arabia? And we’re supposed to find something good to say? I mean, how about “Saudi Arabia: We’re A Shit Hole, But We’re A Rich Shit Hole”?”

I understand your frustration, Nate, but this is our JOB: we are Professionals. Again, people: we want positive, okay?”

“I got it!, Trevor!”

“Yes, Alan?’

“How about “Saudi Arabia: Praise Allah, We Have Oil”?”

“Frankly, I think that’s as good as were going to get today. Good work, people, and wish us luck on landing that Iran Slogan contract…”

I am Laslo.

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