Real Republican Man says:
The Republicans have kept an immaculate lawn through years of prudent tending. It has been seeded and trimmed and is as Pristine as an Augusta Putting Green. This is because we have been Prudent. It is the kind of lawn made for elegant parties with women with large elegant hats to protect their fair skin from the sun: prudent women.
But underneath: the burrowing. Rodents. In the past we have been successful at marginalizing the Rodent Menace, but they keep coming back. And you know what rodents do at an Elegant Lawn Party?
You know EXACTLY what they do: they Shit in the Caviar.
America:our Immaculate Lawn is needed, now more than ever. We can no longer assume that the rodents will be disposed of by traditional methods. Extreme measures may be necessary.
Or do you want to see our Elegant Women with the Elegant Hats eat the same Caviar that the Rodents have just despoiled?
Republicans: you know a Rat when you see one.
I am Keeping a List.
I am Laslo.