Look-alikes to be sucker-punched next:
Jake Gyllenhall. Moon-eyed woe-is-me face.
Ryan Gosling. Sad-eyed face on much too big a head.
Ben Affleck. Used to date Jennifer Lopez face.
Matt Damon. Squeezed donut face.
Brad Pitt. Pretty boy pretending to be soulful face. A second punch for marrying Angelina Jolie. Because.
George Clooney. Insufferably smug motherfucking prick face.
Jeff Goldblum. Pseudo-intellectual self-infatuated face. Like an older Shia LaBeouf, almost.
Philip Seymour Hoffman. Dead, but the lookalike would still deserve it. Puffy squinty self-satisfied pretentious artiste face.
Paul Rudd. Self-aware nice-guy milk face. Punch!
All the male actors in the "Avengers" Series. All of them. You guys are done already. Stop. Mock hero interchangeable faces. Includes Robert Downey Jr: especially.
Paul Giamatti. Quintessential Asking-for-it face.
I am Laslo.
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