"That's it, son. You're going to bed without supper. No pancakes for you."

"The Cocksucking Cocksuckers of Cocksucker Valley."

"Pa, I met a girl!"

"You met a girl, son? Let me guess: you're sweet on her, yes?"

"Oh, I'm sweet on her, Pa. I'm sweet on her indeed!"

"What is this girl's name, son?"

"Melissa!"

"Hmmmm. Melissa. The only Melissa i can think of round these parts is that Melissa girl from the Assfucking Assfuckers of Assfuck Junction."

That's her, Pa! She's Melissa from the Assfucking Assfuckers of Assfuck Junction!"

"Then I'm disappointed in you, son. Haven't I told you us Cocksuckers don't mix with those Assfuckers?"

"But she's special, Pa!"

"Her people get fucked in the ass in exchange for jerked meats, son."

"But we suck cocks for flour, Pa!"

"Exactly, son, and if you cannot see the profound difference there then maybe my years of rearing you have gone to waste. You might as well go seeing a Negro. Or a Chink, for that matter."

"Pa..."

"That's it, son. You're going to bed without supper. No pancakes for you."

"Okay, Pa..."

"Son?"

"Yeah, Pa?"

"Is that jerked beef I see in your pocket?"

"Yes, Pa."

"Give it here, son,"

"But I thought you told us that us Cocksuckers never eat jerked meats."

"We don't, son. I'm going to take it to the store in the morning to see if I can trade it for some flour..."

I am Laslo.