Hack Comic Mic Nite...
"Trump, man... what fucking mess we got into, right..? Look, the guy has a problem with women, okay? I mean, what do you expect from a dude who orders a Slovenian mail-order bride like most people order Chinese take-out ...?
Maybe it's the small hands, I don't know... a LOT of women have looked at those small hands and did the math, if you know what I mean... Hell, his fingers are so short he can't even execute a proper Shocker! Oh, c'mon: you know the Shocker. If you don't, look it up when you get home, the joke will make sense to you then...
Its' like he can't help but put women down whenever he opens his mouth. And -- speaking of 'down' and 'mouth' -- do you think this guy has EVER gone down on a chick? One, we know he's afraid of germs, and Two, he probably can't stop talking long enough to munch some damned carpet...
Yeah, you don't have to bother with cunnilingus when you're that rich. It's just us poor dudes who have to do it, so we have a chance of keeping the woman around... It's not like we can use YUGE diamonds for foreplay and just cut to the chase...
And, if I were a woman, would I want to see that orange hair between my thighs? Am, I right, ladies? It must be hard to orgasm when all you see is an orange pelt moving around down there -- it'd be like a beaver with a spray-tan trying to build a dam in your vagina...
These are just jokes, people: I mean no offense to our lovely First Lady: I LIKE having a First Lady I can finally jerk off to...
You've been a great audience, thank you for laughing...
I am Laslo.
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