Whores Who Have Serviced Al Franken (Excerpts):
Rachel, age 31.
I go up to the hotel room my Service sent me to and fucking Al Franken opens the door!
I LOVED “It’s Pat!” back in the day…
He welcomes me with some joke about Call Girls and texting, I really wasn’t listening because it really wasn’t funny. But — shit — I remember seeing reruns of “It’s Pat!” on old SNL shows on Comedy Central. Fuck, it was funny: you could never tell if Al Franken was a boy or a girl…
“You’re Pat!” I say, setting my purse on the hotel chair.
“Uh… I’m Al,” he says, smiling sheepishly.
“Oh, I know: AL,” I say, nodding. “But you were REALLY funny as Pat!”
“Pat? He says, pushing his glasses up his nose.
“Yeah, Pat! No one could tell if you were male or female. You rocked!”
“Uh… That wasn’t me,” he says, shaking his head.
“Yeah, yeah: I know it wasn’t you-you, it was just a character you played — but it was the Bomb!”
“Uh… I didn’t play Pat. That was another actor.”
“Because Pat looked a LOT like you.”
“No, no… I’m not Pat. I’m just Al. I’m a Senator.”
“Sorry,” I said, but I think he could tell my disappointment: I tried to suck his shrivelled cock but he couldn’t get it up…
“Uh, no offense, but I asked for a ‘young girl’…
“I get it,” I say. Fucking old white guy: he wants Tabitha, the little blonde bitch who looks like she’s twelve.
“I’ll call the Service,” I say.
“And can she wear, like, pigtails?” He asks.
“It’s your money,” I say, leaving. What an asshole, but Damn I thought he was ‘Pat’…
I am Laslo.