"No: no I didn't. But I showed my tits for it, so it is mine."

"Daddy Issue America": an Excerpt...

"Mom! I got an 'A' on my term paper!"

"I am SO proud of you, sweetie!"

"It had big words and everything!"

"That's fantastic! What was it about?"

"Ummm..."

Amanda?"

"Yes, Mom?"

"Did you WRITE the paper?"

"No: no I didn't. But I showed my tits for it, so it is mine."

"Indeed, baby! If you can trade showing your tits in place of spending hours doing humdrum work, THAT is what is important in Life."

"I know!"

"How long did you show your tits?"

"Three seconds, Mom."

"Three seconds? It only took you three seconds to then get an 'A' on a paper? I am so PROUD of you."

"So I did the right thing?"

"Amanda: men will do almost anything you want if you show them a little something-something. That is how the World works."

"Yeah! Claire -- you know, the girl who acts all smart and shit? -- she only got a 'B+'!"

"Claire?"

"Yeah, Claire. The fat girl."

"Oh!: Claire. I bet SHE wishes she could get an 'A' for showing her tits."

"I bet. I think the only one who wants to see her tits is the School Janitor, because he is really creepy around the chubby girls."

"Now Amanda: some men know how to lower their standards."

"I'll never have to go out with a scool janitor, will I, Mom?"

"Not if you keep up your grades, my 'A' student Girl..."

I am Laslo.