Friday, May 20, 2016

"Um, Dude: you're, like, a foot tall. Don't make me hurt you."

Scene from "Prince: The Purple Avenger."

Criminal: "Wait! Who is that in the alley attempting to thwart my escape?"

Prince: "It is I, Prince: The Purple Avenger."

Criminal: "Prince? Like "Purple Rain" Prince?"

Prince: "Indeed. I write funky songs, play guitar and fight crime."

Criminal: "Man, I loved "Purple Rain"! I can't believe it -- I robbed a bank, and now I get to meet Prince."

Prince: "Prepare to be subdued, criminal."

Criminal: "Um, Dude: you're, like, a foot tall. Don't make me hurt you."

Prince: "I've taken down bigger than you. I have seen every Bruce Lee film ever made."

Criminal: "C'mon, man. Shouldn't you be at your mansion, playing piano or banging some hot chick?"

Prince: "Where there is Crime, there shall be... The Purple Avenger."

Criminal: "You're in high heels, dude. With a purple cape. You can't be serious."

Prince: "Watch me."

(fight scene)

Criminal: "What the Hell just happened?"

Prince: "I defeated you with my Prince-Fu, and have tied you up in Purple Rope -- the sign that The Purple Avenger has captured another criminal."

Criminal: "Aw, shit. This is gonna be embarrassing in prison."

Prince: "Naw. Embarrassing would entail being captured by R. Kelly and having him pee in your mouth..."

I am Laslo.

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