'Samuel, the Transsexual Alabama Slave.'
"Samuel, what the Hell is going on in the Slaves' Quarters?"
"What do you mean, Massah?"
"First you say you're not a man, but a woman...."
"That's right, Massah: that's right."
"Now Morgan is saying he's not a man OR a woman. What the Hell is that?"
"He just don't feel like one or the other, Massah."
"But there is only one or the other, Samuel. What in God's Name am I supposed to with him..her...whatever?"
"Well, Massah, Morgan will still be pickin' cotton from sun-up to sundown."
"Maybe that's the problem, right there."
"I must be taking it too easy on all of you, you're all having too much time to think."
"Oh, I don't knows about that."
"After picking cotton you should be so tired you'd turn down a slice of watermelon just so you could go to blessed sleep."
"I know I'ms pretty darned tired at the end of the day..."
"Maybe I should just whip him until he picks one or the other. That would be fair now, right?"
"Massah, maybe you could just sell him to someone else."
"Someone else? No one's gonna pay good money for a slave who don't even know what it is."
"That's a darned shame, Massah."
"Hell, pretty soon you slaves'll be thinking you ain't even slaves any more. How's THAT going to work?"
"I wouldn't mind findin' out..."
"What was that, Samuel?"
"Oh, nothin', Massah. All of this just has me confused, that's all.."
"I don't like confusion, Samuel, it dulls the senses."
"Don't I know it, Massah."
"Samuel, when you said you were a woman I didn't know what to make of it at first, but I have to say: you make a lot of sense for a Woman."
"I tries, Massah, I tries..."
I am Laslo.