Thursday, July 28, 2016

How can I inspire my patients when I know that Hillary will never live through a full term?


"Ms. Meadows, Clinically Depressed Therapist"

My patients, they look to me to tell them that it will be okay when Obama is gone. They say that, just maybe, Hillary might be wonderful, too, but you can tell by their imploring eyes they don't believe it...

As a Therapist, I can confidently say that Hillary suffers from chronic depression, masked by moments of delusional grandeur and excessive alcohol. How can I inspire my patients when I know that Hillary will never live through a full term? How can I help them when there is no Help to be had, anywhere? The alcoholism they suffer, just to make it through another day? Hillary has that, too...

At least when Hillary blacks out drunk and hits her head on the floor there are Secret Service Agents and Doctors right there to help her. The best my patients can expect is to fall down drunk, split their head open on the corner of a table, and slowly, inexorably bleed out, to perhaps be discovered days later by the landlord due to complaints about the smell. And their cat will be taken to a shelter, abandoned and euthanized. That is where we are going, people...

I am very drunk, but I will drive to the Liquor Store to get more alcohol. It's OK, I make the drive drunk all the time...


I am Laslo.


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