"I think we should print that up with some pretty colors and frame it."

"Daddy Issue America": an Excerpt...

"So Amanda, how was Mr. Kimble today?"

"He's pretending that nothing ever happened."

"Men do that a lot, my sweet. It's how they can live with themselves in a state of continued sexual frustration."

"I guess so. So anyway I got an 'A' on my Poem."

"You wrote a poem?"

"For class."

"No shit, Amanda: read it to me!"

"Aw, Mom...."

"Please?"

"OK.... Here goes:

I am a Flower

Just Starting to Bloom

Sometimes

I Stay Inside My Room

And Wonder what My Future

Will Bring

Then I Listen to the Birds Sing

And Count All the Men

Who Want to Fuck Me

In the Ass."

"That's beautiful, darling. And so true: I remember those feelings myself, just like it was yesterday."

"Thanks, Mom."

"I think we should print that up with some pretty colors and frame it."

"That would be kind of cool... You're the best, Mom."

"I'm more than your Mother, Amanda: I am your Friend..."

I am Laslo.