Weiner drunk at the bar....
I mean, I married her, right? Or she married me? I thought I knew what I was getting into -- I'm the Man, I'm the One who sets the path....
But then, she is the confidant of the most powerful woman in politics. I'm still her husband, right? I didn't marry the both of them, except it turns out I did...
Look, I knew it was volatile. She comes from a stern Muslim family, she edited a Journal that says things that I would be ashamed to say I believe to my own Mother. But it's just Pretend, right? All that political stuff, all that Religion Stuff: know one REALLY means it, right? I mean: she married a Jew -- I thought we were, like, all in on the Joke...
Then I never see her. She is always by Hillary's side, sublimating herself to her. Has she ever sublimated herself to ME? Like, even once? She treats Hillary like the Husband, not me...
So I have a lot of time on my hands, and my wife is off being Hillary's husband. Sure I took a photo of my dick: is it wrong for me to believe that SOMEONE still wants to see it...?
'Carlos Danger' was MEANT to be funny. I'm not dangerous. My Wife's family might be, the Clintons very well might be, but I am innocuous: my fucking name is Wiener, right? I've been a punchline all of my life, and I learned to roll with it, until I turned out to be a punchline for my wife and her political husband: like I never heard the comments, the quips...?
I am a joke to my wife, a joje to the possible next President of the United States, a joke to her husband the former President, a joke to their millionaire daughter. America: look at my dick. At least it's mine. No one sold their soul for it, right?
I'm sorry America, but the Big Joke is Right In Front Of You, so just laugh at me instead. Ha Ha. Everyone does.
I am Carlos Danger, dammit.
I am Laslo.
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