Socially Awkward Guy Who Makes No Eye Contact says:
I had a pet rat once. My Mother hated him, but that's because she never took the time to learn how smart and warm and affectionate he was...
I taught him tricks, and at night he would nuzzle me on the nose and then go to sleep beside me while I tickled his tummy. Sure, there were tiny bits of rat poop on the bed, but the acne on my back left blood and pus on my sheets anyway, so who was I to be picky? I mean, my rat never once complained about me wetting the bed: we had a real deep bond that way...
Anyway, one day my mother brought home a cat and said the cat was a REAL pet. That same night the cat killed my rat while I was sleeping: I still torture myself with the thought of not being there for him when he needed me most, the little guy...
Then -- the next day after Mom's cat killed my rat -- my Mother gave the cat away and said now we don't need a cat anymore, did we? Sometimes I picture my rat coming back a hundred feet tall and tormenting my Mother in a corner of the kitchen as she cries and pees and cries some more. Look who's peeing NOW, Mom: look who's peeing now...
Like no one else thinks these things.
I hope the Girl with the Blue Hair is working at McDonalds today.
I am Laslo.
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