Sunday, October 9, 2016

"I know. It seems the humans just have a problem with having ANY anal leakage."

"Pop, you look particularly intense today."

"I think they injected me with caffeine and rabies, Swayze."

"I'm sorry, Pop. Remember the good old days? When all we had to test was Olestra?"

"Oh yeah! We would spend days eating endless amounts of potato chips! And we never even got fat! I didn't even mind the anal leakage."

"Me, neither! Anal leakage was a small price to pay for eating potato chips all day!"

"I miss the days when all I had to worry about was anal leakage. Now I have to deal with internal bleeding."

"Yeah. I'm tired of all the raw sores on my skin from what they injected me with. I'd take anal leakage any day of the week!"

"Me, too!"

"Whatever happened to Olestra?"

"The humans tried it with their chips for awhile, but didn't like the anal leakage."

"Anal leakage seems such a small price to pay for such tasty chips."

"I know. It seems the humans just have a problem with having ANY anal leakage."

"Maybe they should try having cancer injected in their ass instead, like we do. Then they'd realize anal leakage is the least of their problems."

"That is so true. Man, I miss those days."

"Me too, Pop, me too. I don't think I can stomach testing another gluten-free product...."

"I know! What is with that?

I guess gluten affects some Humans' bowels wrong."

"What is it with Humans and their asses? They either shit too much or shit too little or too hard or too soft."

"Or have anal leakage."

"That's right. You can't forget the anal leakage."

"Good luck today, Pop."

Good luck, Swayze."

I am Laslo.

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